***Trigger warning – this post contains descriptions of terror and trauma***
This is a Disabled Pagan Voices Project submission
Once terrified here, trust ripped apart.
5 years on & I’ve now made a new start.
I’d “quake in my boots” & fall to the floor.
How many times must I do this?
Oh! Just once more.
My home where it happened, once a safe space.
Became the place where my demons I’d face.
Face in the mornings, face in the day, battle at night.
But here I did stay.
Slowly, slowly, terror turned to determination.
I painted the walls, threw out traumatic memories; started my own salvation.
I didn’t know how long it would take.
I tiled my own floors and back into a home I did make.
It wasn’t easy and it wasn’t fast.
But doing things gradually, over much time, means it’ll last.
With walls different colours & books & art on display.
I feel I can now move on, all terror & shakes gone away.
I say this to inspire – please don’t pity me.
I built my new life up & I’m now full of glee.
I’m so proud of all my work and finally….finalllllly.
I celebrate the subtle return of my now rebalanced light & dark energy.