Deenagh: The Pictish Years Chapter 10 – Illusions and Ego

This is a Disabled Pagan Voices Project Submission

Deenagh continued to heal The Dragon for many days, and most nights she slept in the canopy of the nearby Oak tree that she had for a temporary bed. However, she had to return back to Anoc-Par occasionally, mainly for supplies of healing plants and food for herself, but also to let the clans folk
know that she was alright, because Duira in particular would only worry about her if he did not get to see her for long periods of time. She discovered that The Dragon did not need to eat just yet, and her Tree Mother reassured Deenagh that Dragons would eat a vast amount that would keep them going for weeks, so she merely had to keep bringing The Dragon fresh water to drink, and that was an awful lot of water. Deenagh could not let anyone know about The Dragon, and she had so far managed to keep him a secret. She didn’t think about why, but she knew that The Dragon had to be protected and kept safe from harm, believing it to be important, and her Tree Mother had agreed with Deenagh that The Dragon could not be mentioned to anyone.

It wasn’t unusual for Deenagh to be gone from Anoc-Par for days and nights on her ramblings, and everyone knew what she was like. Even the Shamaness used it to her advantage and sent Deenagh off on long treks to find healing plants, which meant that the Shamaness didn’t have to teach her the Shamanic ways, which in truth she had no intention of doing. It also suited the Shamaness that Deenagh was reluctant to undertake the Apprenticeship formally, and she never pursued Deenagh to begin her studies. The Shamaness was simply put, selfish and lazy, and she still didn’t like Deenagh any more than when she had first arrived in Anoc-Par to take the place of the Old Shaman. Nevertheless, the Shamaness became suspicious of Deenagh’s activities, because to her, Deenagh was transparent and easy to read, and the Shamaness was waiting for Deenagh to slip up somehow so she could tell the rest of the clans folk that this girl wasn’t so sweet after all. The Shamaness knew that Deenagh was hiding something because this annoying child was off in her own world even more than usual and although the village folk accepted this as a part of Deenagh, the Shamaness was jealous of the level of freedom the girl had. So the Shamaness decided to follow Deenagh one day to the clearing where the Dragon was continuing to heal from his injuries, and she watched as Deenagh treated the wounds on a Great Golden Dragon. The Shamaness was astounded, scarcely believing what she was seeing, but she remained hidden from sight, and then went away in deep thought as to what she was going to do.

When Deenagh returned to the village that evening, the Shamaness was waiting for her, ready for a confrontation. The first thing the Shamaness said to Deenagh was that she knew her secret. Deenagh was momentarily stunned, but not entirely surprised, because to try to keep a huge Dragon a secret was no mean feat, and although she had been successful until now, she knew that eventually she would have to tell the village Chief. However, that time was not yet, and Deenagh knew what to do, because it was on this day that The Dragon spoke to her in her mind, as clear as speaking with the
Spirits, yet different. Deenagh knew it to be The Dragon when he first communicated with her, because it was an energy so powerful and unique that it could only be from a great being such as this Great Golden Dragon. He conveyed to Deenagh that the village Shamaness had followed her and was now watching them both. The first thing Deenagh wondered was how the Dragon knew this when she was unaware of anyone nearby, having had to be so careful for the past number of days. Her second thought was that this Dragon could communicate with her and she assumed that she too
would be able to communicate with him, like she did with her Tree Mother. Until that moment she had been talking away to him out loud, but not having any response, Deenagh began to wonder if Dragons had Spirits in the same way as trees, rocks and just about all life did, and that communication between the two may only be in a physical body language sense. So when The Dragon clearly spoke to Deenagh in her mind, her third thought was why hadn’t he communicated before now. Putting all
these thoughts aside, Deenagh realised she had a problem and only thoughts of solving this problem now occupied her mind.

The Dragon continued their conversation when the Shamaness had left and went back to the village, and they were alone once again. He explained to Deenagh that they had formed a connection and were able to communicate with each other through mind speak, even if they weren’t physically
together. Deenagh was rather bemused because she hadn’t known a connection like it before. When she spoke to the Spirits of the trees and rocks, she could feel an intuitive answer back in her mind, and to her that was just like having a conversation in her head, something she believed most, if not all of the clans folk could do. With the Dryad the communication was easier, but Deenagh had often pondered on this and understood it to be as a result of just how long she had known and spoken with her beloved Tree Mother. However, it was different with The Dragon, because this was like having a separate voice inside her head, and an energy unlike any she had experienced before. She discovered that she could answer him with feelings and pictures as well as speaking the words aloud. Deenagh tried to understand how they could communicate with each other, but decided that some things just couldn’t be explained, at least not in any way that made sense, so she just accepted it.

Deenagh listened carefully as The Dragon told her what to do when the Shamaness would confront her when she returned to the village. Deenagh had to firstly act surprised, and allow the Shamaness the smugness of thinking she was the one holding the power. Deenagh needed to be ready to answer the questions, but The Dragon had a plan. Deenagh was to bring the Shamaness back to the clearing where The Dragon remained in wait. The Dragon was going to trick the Shamaness into thinking that it was an evil Spirit that had created the illusion of a Dragon, and he would nudge the Shamaness into defeating this evil Spirit, thereby appealing to her sense of ego. With the plan hatched, Deenagh told the Shamaness that she saw this Dragon just that day, and yes she was helping to heal him, and that the Shamaness must come with her to meet The Dragon. So the two of them headed for the clearing, and when they got there, The Dragon was gone and in his place there was a man dressed in a black cloak chanting words of power. The Dragon had told Deenagh to tell the Shamaness that the
Spirits had spoken to her just then and revealed that this man was a dark magician who had conjured The Dragon, and that the Shamaness had to confront this man and stop him from encroaching on their village. The Shamaness faced the man in black and called on her Spirit guides to help cast the evil away. With much drama, the Shamaness defeated the dark magician, and her ego soared. What actually happened was that The Dragon had cast an illusion of a man to draw the Shamaness into a
battle that she was always going to win. The Shamaness was so pleased with herself for being able to defeat this powerful evil that her pride blinded her from seeing the truth. She also thought to herself with some satisfaction that this annoying child wasn’t so special after all when she was fooled so
easily by the illusion of a Dragon. The Shamaness left the clearing to return to Anoc-Par and didn’t think anything more about there actually being a Dragon, so she was well and truly tricked.

Deenagh felt such relief as she stood alone again in the clearing, because she knew that the Shamaness was off her case for now until the truth would eventually have to come out. Until then, Deenagh could get back to the important task of healing The Dragon. She couldn’t wait to see him again and ask him questions, for there was so much she wanted to learn, and this Dragon, it was now evident, could help her with that.

My name is Deenagh Jackson and the process of my writing has helped me understand my own Pagan beliefs in this modern day, while also helping me to connect with my Ancestors of old.

The Deenagh series of books which I started writing almost 2 years ago are about the main character Deenagh who can remember her past lives and each book tells the story of the lifetimes she has lived and the lessons learned, with her Spiritual beliefs at the heart which are important to Deenagh.
This is the first time I have shared my stories outside my close circle of friends, but as a wise man once told me “a stranger is a friend yet to be”, so feel free to contact me by email 
Brightest Blessings, Deenagh